[29 Aug 2004|09:15pm] [ mood | blank ] [ music | deathc ab for cutie ] so where do you go when here is so dull the only sharp thing is the yearn for anything new when the people are the same just in different costumes with different details but you cant leave escape to somewhere else because youre just a crash dummy too in your own ridiculous costume with your own pathetic details as if anything could make you more more then transparent at best to anyone real so youre stuck baried in your own trivial drama that keeps you occupied in all the gaps where you feel alone but one day youll dig yourself out and the only thing left here will be you so leave and run to a place where the sharp objects are real and cut farther down then skin deep bleed emo

[05 Aug 2004|10:47pm] [ music | bright eyes ] its weird being connected by a string, fragile and translucent strung by a invisible spider that leaves us dangling spinning away alienated in are blind eyes blurred by intentions and obscured by agendas and to us if the light hits the web just perfectly it disappears leaving us falling cascading down and out of focus but then the perspective shifts and the string swings tempting us with the thought that it was never really gone or making us question if it was ever really there bleed emo

[29 Jul 2004|09:46pm] a double helix of diversity answers the prayer for a savior not a lord but better a futile hope of someone beyond who lays beautifully unaffected by society or the joke we call culture who can see the truth plainly without bull shit bias created as an excuse to inadvertantly segregate, a scapegoat for cruelty in a way to quiet to be barbaric to profound to be inhuman yeah i dont know... 2 | bleed emo

[27 Jul 2004|03:16pm] [ mood | bored ] [ music | about to put in the smashing pumpkins ] man mt airy. these kinda entries are going to get old, i know. but to come back to Carroll County when u were somewhere so much closer to perfect, its a kick in the ass. even the people i didnt really talk to there, it's weird not to just see them around hobbling up the hill or running on the weiner. and for once i wish people read this just so i could say bye to all the people i didnt get the chance to, or didnt for some reason. and the worst part is, i know in like a month, it will wear off. and all the stuff that happened there, will probably fade. and all the sudden motivation i have in being better probably wont turn into anything. because i can already feel myself slipping slipping back here. grimy and smelly with smoke and cow poop and at the carnival the everpresent stink of peoples BO people who i know i judge to much that dont deserve any of the names i think of them, subconsciously now. its weird because i used to think i wasnt like that. but how can i not be when everything around me is that im stupid to have ever thought that i or we were one of the only few things different yeah we dont chew tobacco or raise confederate flags but we judge the people that do 2 | bleed emo

[26 Jul 2004|05:32pm] i miss saranac more then i thought i would but most of all i miss all those syracuse kids. and tubing, even tho it made me feel like pooping. and saranac ball, eventhough when i didnt have my gameface on, i sorta sucked lol. so to keeping the memories alive lol...yo ha bro ha.... 2 | bleed emo

frustrateddd [08 Jul 2004|10:48pm] im not going to right in here anymore not when its all just empty. and when its all just bullshit. maybe someday when i can actually write something something that isnt vacant and fake and useless well till then i guess..... bleed emo

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